Celebrate Being Single: Duck Soup in Nelson, NZ. Mix & Mingle with us on the first Sunday of the month from 7.30pm at the House of Ales.

Blue Christmas: Still single?

Adrienne, Mixologist| December 9, 2009 8:53 pm

Thanks for checking on the latest Duck Soup updates and events - contact Adrienne for more information 544-2088 or 021 480 212.

A 39-year-old woman is depressed around the holidays because she’s alone

Dear Dr. Gail: I am 39 and still single, despite my best efforts. I’m OK with this for most of the year, but not at the holidays. The whole world is all together-y, while I’m alone. How can I at least make myself not feel worse? — Single Gal

Dear Single: Though it feels you are alone, you are not. Plenty of people are single, divorced, widowed, or otherwise unattached. If you know the holidays will be tough to get through, I suggest you prepare ahead. Be proactive about making plans instead of hoping or expecting something will come up. Let people know you would like

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How to Survive Being Single at Christmas

Adrienne, Mixologist| December 4, 2009 8:44 pm

How to Survive Being Single at Christmas

Contributor

By Kristian Keefer

eHow Contributing Writer

Article Rating: (1 Ratings)

The holiday season never seems quite the same when you are single. If you are one of the few singles among your family and friends, you might feel a little out of place over the holidays. By reaching out to others and joining with your other single friends, you can actively participate in holiday festivities and enjoy the true meaning of Christmas without feeling lonely.

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Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Step

1

Attend holiday parties and events if you do need to fly solo. There is no reason to be embarrassed if you are single over the holidays. Almost everyone goes through periods of being single. Participate in holiday meals and gatherings just as you would if you were the other half of a couple.

Step

2

Invite another single friend to attend holiday parties and meals with you. If you buddy up with someone else who knows how lonely you feel on the holidays, you will not feel so out of place and unusual. Of course, you will also be helping your friend to feel a little less alone over the holiday as well.

Step

3

Volunteer at a local nursing home during the holiday season. You can share your time and spread joy to elderly people who do not have many visitors during the holidays. There are many residents of retirement communities who are lonely and could use a friend like you. Make their season brighter and bring some love into your own heart by volunteering.

Step

4

Volunteer your time at a holiday meal for people who are homeless or who are poor. You will not be spending time alone and you will be making a difference in the holiday for others. This is a tradition you can continue even in years to come when you are no longer single at Christmas. You can volunteer with your loved one when that day comes.

Step

5

Participate in local holiday events and performances. You can sign in a local church choir or perform in a community Christmas play. Join other members of your community to sing Christmas carols throughout the neighborhood. Being actively involved will help to keep your mind occupied so that you do not feel alone. You will be among friends and neighbors. You might even meet someone new.

Tips & Warnings

Give your family and friends some notice if you will be bringing another single friend along with you to a holiday meal.

The holiday season never seems quite the same when you are single. If you are one of the few singles among your family and friends, you might feel a little out of place over the holidays. By reaching out to others and joining with your other single friends, you can actively participate in holiday festivities and enjoy the true meaning of Christmas without feeling lonely.

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Duckling Dinner Details

Adrienne, Mixologist| November 25, 2009 9:00 pm

Meet at Club Waimea in Lower Queen Street, Richmond (opposite the Fairgrounds) from7pm for drinks, then dinner at approx. 7.30pm – then time for playing games of pool after dinner.
Adrienne
544-2088
021.480.212

Categories: Updates
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Next Networking Night – Sun 6 Dec

Adrienne, Mixologist| November 16, 2009 9:00 am

Join us for social networking and an early Christmas Party at the House of Ales from 7.30pm on Sunday 6 December. There will also be another special prize draw from the fans of our facebook page. If you have a facebook.com account, sign on and search for DUCK SOUP to find our page. Click the “Become a Fan” link and be in to win!

Categories: Monthly Mingle
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Amazing Night

Adrienne, Mixologist| November 15, 2009 7:00 am

Thanks for an awesome time last night at Dusk Till Dawn. Over 170 singles (I stopped counting when I sat down for dinner…) grooving to the Nelson pulse on a Saturday night. Congratulations to our hosts The Free House, When In Rome, The Vic & Zatori where the welcome was warm and the drinks & food were delicious. I hope our out-of-town guests had a blast and will be back sooooon!

Categories: Get Out & Groove, Updates
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The Free House from 5pm Saturday

Adrienne, Mixologist| November 11, 2009 8:38 pm

The response has been HUGE for Dusk Till Dawn on Saturday night – you’ll find plenty of new singles to meet when you come along to The Free House (95 Collingwood Street) any time between 5pm-7pm.

The registration process will be similar to a Duck Soup night where you collect a name-tag as you arrive. Please don’t be concerned about coming alone – most people will! You will also be given a flyer with a map and the following specials:

If this is your first experience at one of the Duck Soup singles events, please sign up for the mailing list and you’ll be sent an invitation to other opportunities to get out and meet some new friends.

By the way – The Vic will have the football on TV from 8pm if you’re interested in catching the score.

See you Saturday….
Adrienne, Mixologist

Categories: Get Out & Groove
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Nelson Dusk Till Dawn on Sat 14 Nov

Adrienne, Mixologist| October 21, 2009 7:58 pm

Drinks & Dinner, Dancing & Dessert
Please schedule a BIG NIGHT OUT on Saturday 14 November when Duck Soup is combining with FindSomeone.co.nz for a Singles Dusk Till Dawn Party Night in Nelson. There are over 50 online dating singles coming to Nelson for the weekend from all over NZ. On the evening of Saturday 14 November Duck Soup will celebrate being single with drinks, dinner, dancing & dessert from dusk till dawn at four different Nelson venues.

To participate, you are invited to register on Saturday 14 November between 5-7.30pm at the FreeHouse opposite the Indian Cafe on Collingwood Street. This is the first drinks venue where you will collect your name tag and venue map showing where to walk to the other venues around Nelson. You will receive a discount coupon towards a drink at the FreeHouse then a $20 special meal including a drink at brand new Italian restaurant When In Rome on Hardy Street for dinner. There will be more drink specials at the Vic BrewBar at the top of Trafalgar Street while band Don’t Fret play – then a coffee & dessert treat for $10 at Zatori Chocolate Cafe on the Museum Corner. There is NO CHARGE to participate – however, you will be required to wear your name tag to distinguish you as part of the Singles Group – which will also help us remember your name!

Categories: Get Out & Groove, Updates
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Richmond Duckling Dinner

Adrienne, Mixologist| October 18, 2009 8:07 pm

I’m arranging another ‘younger group’ Duck Soup dinner in Richmond this Thursday 26 November and you’re welcome to come along if you believe you fit into this category.

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Networking Night Sunday 1 November

Adrienne, Mixologist| 3:43 pm

Join us for social networking at the House of Ales from 7.30pm on Sunday 1 November. Celebrate Barry’s 5th year of operation at the House of Ales this month with a free glass of bubbles if you bring your special card from last month.

There will also be another special prize draw from the fans of our facebook page. If you have a facebook.com account, sign on and search for DUCK SOUP to find our page. Click the “Become a Fan” link and be in to win!

Don’t forget to schedule the Dusk Till Dawn Nelson singles night on Sat 14 Nov into your calendar…. it’s going to be a fun night (some of you may need a nana-nap that afternoon to keep up!). Registration is free and there will be special prices on drinks, dinner & dessert/coffee for those with a Duck Soup nametag on…. Interested in joining us…..? Register your interest here:::::

Categories: Get Out & Groove, Monthly Mingle
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Don’t Ditch Dating!

Adrienne, Mixologist| October 13, 2009 5:48 pm

I attended a restaurant opening in Nelson this week and met up with a Duck Soup regular who excitedly told me he may have

found someone – early days though. I was of course equally excited for him and asked lots of questions – where did you

meet? (online) What about her attacted you the most? (similar quirky sense of humour) etc. But then I started to hear

some warning bells and saw some red flags with other things I heard so my questioning took a different turn. I asked him

what he disliked most about the dating process…. and boy did things clear up for me!

This is a guy who is SICK of dating – dreads the first date and is totally over the whole concept. It turns out he has

had six dating partners since his marriage ended and now he’s ready to STOP dating and start a relationship because, in

his words, “six women should be enough to give me a good idea, right?”

Unfortunately I believe he is falling into a common trap and there are numerous reasons he may feel this way.

he may not believe he will ever find the ‘right’ woman

he may feel impatient with the dating process

he doesn’t understand the importance of dating to find love

he is a little shy and it’s hard to get out of your comfort zone

he doesn’t enjoy meeting new people

he doesn’t really trust new people

he doesn’t like or know how to flirt

he doesn’t think there are any decent single women around

All of these points are focusing on the negative! It’s the top reason people jump too quickly into relationships and

ditch the dating too soon. We forget that dating is a really important process for finding love that cannot be avoided.

One of the key things to attempt to do is find a way to ENJOY this process even if you don’t like every step. By shifting

your limiting belief about dating, you’ll attract better prospects – remember, like attracts like.

Hopefully you can start learning to enjoy meeting new people. The more the better! It can be really fun – you never know

who you might meet or what cool things you may learn. One of my now closest friends I met randomly whilst our kids were

playing at a park….

If you hold this same attitude that meeting new people is tedious, try turning this around. Make a challenge or game out

of it to see how many people you can meet in a month. Find interesting (& positive) details you’ve learned from each man

or woman you meet and don’t take the whole process so seriously! Dating is your interview process for the position of

your potential life partner. And it’s also important for YOU to interview for the position of THEIR life partner…

slowly, and gradually, you’ll build up an authentic picture of each person you date over time. Date as many people as you

can (without sleeping with any of them!) and someone will gradually become more compatible in your mind.

It may take some practice, but you can make this positive shift. When you are cheerful about meeting new people, you’ll

appear more confident and happy which will in turn make you more attractive. It’s a cycle of positive energy that builds

on itself…. and when you do meet the person who just fits so well into your life, you’ll be so glad you stuck it out and

KEPT DATING!

If you’re thinking – man, I can’t even GET a date, let alone have more than one – then consider online dating on

findsomeone.co.nz. If you need assistance to write your profile and choose a great photo, let me know. Alternatively, use

Duck Soup networking to ask someone if they would like to go on a date to learn more about them – but remember, not

everyone comes to Duck Soup to find love – many people are networking to expand their social lives without looking for a

partner. So be prepared for a “No, thanks” and keep trying! Every NO is a step towards a Y

I attended a restaurant opening in Nelson this week and met up with a Duck Soup regular who excitedly told me he may have found someone – early days though. I was of course equally excited for him and asked lots of questions like:

Where did you meet? (online)
What about her attracted you the most? (similar quirky sense of humour) etc.

But then I started to hear some warning bells and saw some red flags with other things I heard so my questioning took a different turn. I asked him what he disliked most about the dating process…. and boy did things clear up for me!

Show me more… »

Categories: Dating Tips
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